Because I will be attending three baseball games in one week. That's 27 innings (barring overtime) in 168 hours.
"Heaven!" cheer you baseball lovers.
"Boring pit of dispair," cringe haters.
And while I don't consider myself a Baseball Hater per se, I will admit to feeling little love for the sport. In fact, I will say that I find it the most boring sport to watch. Even golf is better (I will be watching quite a bit of that in the next week as well).
I never understood why there must be 9 innings when 7 will do just as well. Seventh inning stretch? Not when you have the end of the game fast approaching. I always find the actual "stretch" portion of the game to commence around inning 4 anyway. That's usually when I make the second trip to the beer stand.
I don't know why baseball bores me. I certainly enjoyed playing the game in gym class...to an extent. Perhaps it's having to watch long stretches of boring nothingness until something exciting happens. But don't blink! That "something interesting" will be over in less time than it takes to flag down the roving beer vendor. And it's not like they won't have an instant replay or three on the Jumbotron for you to enjoy if you happened to be in the restroom during the play.
And goodness knows you'll be using the restroom if you've been using your boredom as an excuse to drink yourself into excitement.