2009 Super Bowl Ads

It seems necessary to do a rundown of the best and worst Super Bowl ads. The Super Bowl is, after all, the, well, "super bowl" of advertising to use the parlance of our times. In general, I found Super Bowl XLIII a bit lackluster until the final 10 minutes. My friends and I only really watched for the commercials, and even those we found somewhat wanting. I can't remember a time when I felt more apathetic in the weeks leading up to the Super Bowl. Regardless, here's the rundown as we saw it:

Our three favorites:

1. Doritos snow globe

Two coworkers chatting in front of the company vending machine. Coworker 1 comments on what a nice snowglobe Coworker 2 has. C2 says, no, no, it isn't a snowglobe, but rather a crystal ball. C1 is dubious and so C2 says the crystal ball told him they would get free doritos at work today. He then proceeds to throw said snowglobe at vending machine, glass shatters across the scene, and it's free doritos for everyone. The commercial ends with C1, not to be outdone, asking the "crystal ball" if he will get a promotion. He then throws the snowglobe at his boss, promptly hitting him in the junk. We can assume a promotion is not forthcoming.

This ad had my friend laughing so loud we had to rewind the DVR to catch the bit about the promotion. Every funny commercial thereafter was deemed "funny, but not as good as the doritos snowglobe ad."

2. Toyota with the big tranny

This ad showed a truck towing 10,000 pounds up a steep incline. An incline that also happened to resemble one of those spiral slides you see at old-school playgrounds (you know, the ones that are still made of metal and have yet to be torn down and replaced with hypoallergenic plastic slides by the mafia mom neighborhood police). What broke me was when the announcer referred to the truck's transmission as a "tranny." Something about how "towing 10,000 pounds up a steep grade isn't good for your tranny." It never is, Toyota, it never is.

3. Miller 1 Second Ad

Perhaps it was all the hype leading up to this spot, but my friends and I spent the entire Super Bowl waiting for this 1 second. Just when we thought we must've missed it, we did miss it and had to rewind the DVR. We were rewarded with a Miller warehouse guy gleefully exclaiming "Miller High Life!"

We laughed, and it was awesome. For one second, Miller did better than all of the Budweiser ads. In the words of my friend, "if I see another horse commercial, I swear to god..."

Honorable mentions:

Hulu Alec Baldwin - because Alec Baldwin is hilarious

ETrade talking babies - they're always funny

NBC Try Conan O'Brien - because seeing the likes of Martha Stewart and Tina Fey use "Conan O'Brien" in place of a happy ending was a happy ending in itself

Pedigree - I enjoyed watching the ostrich running out the house and, better yet, grandma chasing after it

Monster.com - the one with the moose head in the boss's office and the moose backside in the assistant's office. Anytime you have a moose backside you have an advertising goldmine.

The ones we didn't get:

godaddy.com - mainly because we're women and not the target market. My friends and I did not find these as entertaining as I think they were meant to be

Cash4Gold.com - I found Ed McMahon and MC Hammer sad and pathetic. Ed McMahon telling his gold toilet how much he'll miss it was the one redeeming factor.

Audi - this spot showed a man driving and crashing several cars through the past decades, and then setting his amazed eyes on the new Audi in present day. We didn't understand the purpose of all the other cars. They weren't Audis, so what was the purpose of cars through the ages?

Teleflora - the gist of this ad is to send flowers using teleflora because you wouldn't want to be the douche who sends flowers in a box. My question: how do you even order flowers in a box anymore?

To see the ads you missed, visit Spike or this super bowl ad website where you can vote for your favorite.

Movies I am going to see:

GI Joe, Star Trek, Land of the Lost, and Transformers 2.